Okay, this week, I'm going a little back in the past for this one. One of Universal's doofiest, yet fun pictures ever made. The plot is pretty basic overall: a couple of scientists (and the Professor from Gilligan's Island) discover a group of aliens on Earth operating under absolutely undetectable camouflage
Are preparing for an eventual invasion. The movie is notable primarily for 3 things: The now-iconic design of the Metaluna Mutant:
(Why his slacks have veins around the cuffs, I have no idea.)
The aliens computer/whatsis the Interocitor:
And, of course, Mystery Science Theater 3000 - The Movie
"Leona Helmsley!"
A little while back, I'd picked up a DVD release of just the base movie having heard that there had been significant cuts from the movie for the MST3K release, and many descriptions saying that the eventual journey back to the alien world of Metaluna was "mind-bending".
No, no it was not. The only significant difference between the two cuts is that the actual arrival at Metaluna is cut for time, as the original version has a very long approach sequence showing that the surface of the planet is honeycombed with holes, and the Metalunans actually live under the surface. It's also worth noting that despite many promotional images showing multiple Mutants, there is still only ever one Mutant ever on screen at any given time.
But there's one cut that I say is inexcusable. For those familiar with the MST3k version only, you might remember that when the main character Cal Meacham arrives at the aliens Earth base, one of the people he meets is a German scientist, Dr. Engleborg who is described as going for regular long walks. When the aliens blow up their base before abducting Meacham and Ruth Adams after blowing up their base, it's just assumed that the German was blown up with everyone else there.
Oh no, the truth is far doofier.
Again, you might recall that Meacham and Adams run from their car which is blown up from a laser fired by the alien Brack (although to this day I have no idea exactly where the laser is fired from seeing as it shoots straight down, and the Metalunan saucer hasn't shown up yet). In the MST cut, they run for the airfield right after that. In the actual cut, there's an extra scene between those transitions, and it is fucking hilarious.
Just past the scene of the explosion, Dr. Engleborg calls to Meacham and Adams to see if they're okay...and then he explodes as the laser zaps him.
After seeing that, I had to pause the film I was laughing so hard. It was just so out of nowhere, and the force of the explosion made me wonder exactly how much nitroglycerin the German had drank before his walk that day. And then I had to wonder....why was this cut?? It's easily the funniest thing in the original movie; it'd be like cutting the coat hanger scene from Birdemic: Shock and Terror!
Was it a decision made by Universal or Gramercy...or by the MST3k crew themselves? Either way, why? We have no particular attachment to this character, he's an ancillary character at best, making his detonation just that much funnier. I can only hope that on the off-chance that Universal lets the rights to This Island Earth slip, Rifftrax is able to redo the film in its entirety either as a Video On Demand, or even better at one of their live events.
Alternately, if Mike Nelson, Trace Beaulieu, Kevin Murphy, or anyone else associated with the movie could let me know the truth behind the cut, that would be frigging awesome.
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