Ensign Ricky's Spoilertastic Reviews

Let me get this out there first:

I. Fucking. Love. Robocop.

It is possibly one of the greatest things that the 1980's gave us along with Highlander. No other decade in history could have given us such a perfect storm of awesome. (Well, maybe the 1120's, man those were fucked up.) And the idea of a statue of Robocop being erected in Detroit to commemorate one of the greatest action heroes ever is a brilliant idea if for no other reason than it has sparked interest in the city, and will probably be a tourism draw. If I had anything even resembling disposable income, you can bet your ass that I would make the pilgrimage to pay homage to our Half Man/Half Machine/All Cop bronze idol. Look at it...it's majestic.

But there are some naysayers out there who are pissed off that a community of fans donated their money to have this statue erected. Keep that in mind, this was funded by backers around the world via Kickstarter, with not one cent being paid by the City of Detroit or the State of Michigan. These negative Nancies feel that either A) The money would've been better spent on public works and charity, or B) That because this is a statue of a fictional character from a movie where Detroit is a crime-riddled dystopia, that it somehow speaks poorly of present day Detroit.

The fact that this statue was funded via Kickstarter seems lost on the first group. Could money have been donated to feed the homeless, fight addiction, all that good stuff? Of course, but what exactly is stopping these angry people from starting their own Kickstarters to gain money for those causes? Got a piano tied to your typing fingers? Hey, remember this statue?

Hey, I bet the people of Philadelphia were really made about the expense of that. Oh, wait, Stallone paid for it out of his own pocket? And the only controversy about it was an "Is This Art?" debate?

The second point, well, I kind of understand. But. But. Robocop himself doesn't stand for crime, corruption, decay, all that horrible stuff. No, Robocop stands for something more than that. Let's look at his directives:

Those are what Robocop stands for. Hell, most public servants these days in Canada, the US or wherever can't claim to stand for all three of those. But Robocop does. In a way, we should all aspire to be more like Robocop, to live up to those directives on a day-to-day basis. Can you imagine what the world would be like if we all followed those on a daily basis? Fuck dystopia, that's as close to a utopia as I can imagine!

Robocop isn't a symbol of crime and moral decay, no, he is in a way an ideal; something that we can all aspire to become more like (preferably without the horrific origin where Red Foreman slowly blows us to pieces before mercifully putting one last bullet in our brains).

So statue haters, look at it that way: The Robocop statue is not a monument to social and moral decay, no, it is a monument to inspire us all to be better, to Serve the Public Trust, To Protect the Innocent, and Uphold the Law.

Well, that and shooting rapists in the balls, that's just a given.